The Heathen Hippy Child- Part 4

This is part 4 of my own spiritual journey. For parts 1-3 please see my Dec- Feb blog entries.


The Brothers

A couple months before my 18th birthday, my sister in law met my future husband along with four of his brothers. These brothers were very serious about their spiritual journey. They had sold all they owned in Texas (where they were from) and they were hoping to live in Christian community. At the time that my sister in law met them, they were living in a camp ground in our area of Washington state. The brothers played guitars and sang songs about God. They had taken many popular songs of the day and changed the lyrics. They talked about God a lot and their lives made a big impact on my sister in law. The more she saw of them, the more she would talk about God and them. She also told me that she wanted me to meet them. But I was not interested in meeting them at all! She specifically would mention one of the brothers whose name was Bobby. She said she really wanted me to meet him and not only that but she wanted me to marry him! I was only 17 at the time and although I was on a constant quest for love, marriage was NOT on my mind! Ha! I couldn't figure out why she would want me to marry some "nice" religious guy who was 9 years older than me!

When the brothers ended up moving in with my my sister in law's parents, it seemed like I would finally have to meet them and I did. Well, yes, they were all very nice and they even looked real to me (long hair and no 3 piece suits) and what child of the 70s could resist a little guitar playing, eh? The love they had for others really stood out to me but what made the biggest impression on me was their singing. One song in particular really had an impact upon me. This was the chorus:

Jesus Christ we love you

Jesus Christ our Lord

Jesus Christ we love you

Jesus Christ our Lord.

It was the craziest thing I had ever heard! We're these guys singing to Jesus?! Did they think that Jesus could actually hear them or something? Weird! But... while they sang that song, I had those old goose bumps come back that I had experienced in grade school while singing Silent Night Holy Night. Hmmmm.

Torn Between Two Worlds

I was now stuck between 2 worlds. The world I was most comfortable in (the party world) wasn't really all that comfortable any more. In fact, I was beginning to really hate it, yet I felt trapped there and unable to leave. I had tried and tried to leave the party world but I was unsuccessful. I continued to see Bobby and his brothers occasionally and the little things they would say here and there, their love for others and their songs were really having a positive effect on me but I was still in a different world than they were. I was still smoking marijuana and drinking heavily on a daily basis and although they seemed real to me they were also so "good" and I wasn't! No one had talked to me about being born again, saying the sinners prayer or any of those religious terms. I saw no way out of the bondage I was in but I continued to feel a drawing and a longing for something better.

A boy friend of mine at this time was heading for the army. I told him that God was calling me and I didn’t really want to “get into God" but that was probably what I was gonna do. Real enthusiastic, huh? I did eventually “try” to be a Christian… I started wearing a crucifix around my neck and once again I tried to quit partying. I also had a picture of Jesus on my bathroom mirror and I would look at it every morning…. Wow... My Christian experience was pretty limited to say the least.

~ Grin~ I also tried to figure out how I could be a Christian party girl but I’d always end up compromising. It was pretty useless. I just couldn’t be a Christian.

I had moved out of my mother's home several times during my teen age years because of conflicts with my step dad but strangely enough, tensions accelerated at home after I met Bobby and his brothers. I moved out of my mother's home for good and moved in with my brother and sister in law. This put me often in the company of these radical Texans but I continued with my party life style as well. I had gotten a glimpse of higher things but those higher things continued to seem way beyond my reach. Light, Life and Love! Oh how I wanted them!

A New Life!

Finally, one night while I was lying in bed on my back, I raised my arms up as if to receive a hug and in frustration I said, “Lord Jesus, I need you!” I don’t remember anything else about that night but the next morning, everything was different! I was different! Everything looked different! Everything was brighter and I specifically remember looking intently at the trees and the sky and (as one friend put it) I had a smile plastered on my face. Joy, peace and light were inside of me. I was filled with love, too! I loved everybody! I forgave everyone! I was able to tear up my list of people I hated! (Yes, an actual list) When I visited my mom and step-dad I really "freaked them out" because I wanted to hug them! We were not an affectionate family and I had not been an affectionate person- at all. But all that changed!

At this same time, I began to hear an inner voice speaking to me. I never wondered or doubted who that voice belonged to or where it was coming from. I just knew it was my Lord! My sister in law had given me a Bible that I had never read but then I began to read it for the first time ever and I read it and read it and read it! I was amazed! I was in love with this man from Galilee! Now, HERE was a man I could trust! Here was a man who could love me with a pure love and wash me clean! Here was a man I could follow!

I read all of the New Testament scriptures within a very short time. I saved Hebrews and Romans for last because I thought they sounded like history and I thought History was boring! Ha! I was so excited and so full of the good news that I wanted to share my Jesus with all my party friends! I loved them all so much and I wanted them to be as happy as I was. I was saddened to discover that they didn’t receive my good news immediately like I had hoped… Oh well! I hope they have entered into life now. I know that someday they will!

I spent less and less time with my party friends and more and more time with Bobby and his brothers. My desire for drugs disappeared and I was able to quit smoking in one day! My addiction to alcohol had started at a very young age but the more I grew to know my Lord, the less I drank, until eventually I was not even getting drunk anymore- even when I tried too.

There were many of us who would hang out together singing, talking about God and playing games. We would share meals and we would go places together, too. What happy days those were! It was only the beginning of my new life in Christ and a new life with the family of God. It was a good beginning and a happy ending to the Heathen Hippy Child.

To be continued... Some day